Stagnant adjective (of a body of water or the atmosphere of a confined space) having no current or flow and often having an unpleasant smell as a consequence. “a stagnant ditch” synonyms: still, motionless, static, stationary, standing, dead, slack; more showing no activity; dull and sluggish. “a stagnant economy” synonyms: inactive, sluggish, slow-moving, lethargic, static, flat, depressed, declining, moribund, dying, dead, dormant (google definitions) ~ if i had to pick just one word to describe myself lately this would be it, stagnant.
No current or flow? yes. Still, motionless, stationary, slack? yes. Inactive, sluggish, lethargic, depressed, dormant? yes, yes, yes.
If there’s one thing i’m great at it’s pointing out my own flaws and weaknesses. I should have a crown because i’m the queen of some pretty bad characteristics in my own mind. Another weakness i have.
Stepping aside and letting others who have stronger, more dominant characteristics, take the reigns. I am not one for confrontation. I prefer to allow myself to be weak just to avoid having a tough conversation with someone.
Knowing this about myself made it impossible for me to see myself as a leader. What i didn’t realize is that there are different kinds of “leaders”. And we all lead in different ways according to where our strengths and values lie.
We grow as we develop more strengths and continue to focus on our values. When we try to work with people who have different values than we do, it can throw everything into a tizzy. When it comes to building your business it’s important to keep your values written down somewhere where you can see them regularly.
Continue to remind yourself of them, because as soon as you forget you start to attract the wrong types of people into your business, your tribe. In the past few months i have been busy with constant self-development and i took a “life-coaching” class. I loved the class because coaching, rather than leading, allows the person to create their own positive changes and figure who they want to be, without having someone tell them who they should be.
But, the most significant change i have had recently was when we lost an employee at work. All of a sudden i was the only person there to do the work, all of it, plus the additional jobs that were thrown at me daily just because they still needed done. Surprisingly, as soon as that happened i instinctively went into action.
The “leader” in me resurfaced. I worked day after day, on pile after pile of papers, i reorganized, reprocessed, simplified tasks, and dusted. Yes, i said dusted.
I could see it, but i couldn’t remove it. Everytime i moved something and saw the dust i felt like i was incapable of doing everything i should, i can’t stress how significant it was for me to remove that dust from my focus. Less than 3 weeks later our office is running smoothly.
The piles of paper are gone, work is caught up, and even the patients have noticed a difference. I should probably tie this altogether. First, i needed to work on self-development and stop being stagnant.
No one could do that except me. Then i had to re-evaluate my values and figure out who and what didn’t align with them. Those things and people had to be pushed at an arms length, which caused me to have a very difficult conversation with someone.
Having that conversation dusted me off. It was hard and caused me to feel anxiety – the thought of it made me want to crawl right back onto the sidelines where i was – but i knew it had to be done. Now that the dust is gone i don’t feel like i’m suffocating anymore.
Growth comes in surprising ways sometimes. It’s not always enjoyable and at times it even hurts you and/or others. Do you need dusted off in any areas of your life? is anything suffocating you and keeping you from taking a full breath? are you feeling held back? it’s ok to do something about it, you’re worth it.